.... are closing in on me. I am here sitting in out breezy apartment alone. Tim is at work tonight on duty and Kalea is sleeping. I think I have tried really hard to not reflect on my feelings this evening. Probably because I am feeling one billion of them all at once.
As I think about 2012 it seems like a blur. It seems like it was over so fast and it drug on at the same time. It started with our move from SC to Maine. The first few months it rained and rained and I fought depression every day. Then it let up and before I knew it Kalea was turning 1 year old. Her Birthday felt like a victory for our little family. I am so thankful for her. Watching her grow this year has been so rewarding and amazing. She has learned so many new things. I am so proud of what an amazing little girl she already is. I started this year with a baby and I am ending with a toddler. I have got to have all those amazing moments with her I always dreamed of having. Watching her take her first steps, learning to eat table foods and sleeping in her own room.
I feel like I finally settled into being a stay at home mom. Some days get boring but most days I am perfectly content being at home with her all day.
I have had mixed emotions about living here in New England. Some days it's so wonderful and I love it and other days I feel like I am in a different country. I guess I am just a west coast girl at heart;) I have missed being near my family so much. Life seems to be speeding up and I just want to be close to those that I love so much. I have made some amazing friends up here though and I am so blessed to have been in the Somersworth ward. It has been a testimony building place for me and I am so grateful that they have helped bring the spirit back into our lives as a stronger force. I have felt that this is truly where we were supposed to be.
Looking ahead at the moment our future is uncertain. We are still waiting to hear from out dream job. Deep down I am terrified and ok all at once. On one hand I know that the Lord has never let us down. We are always taken care of and everything works out. On the other hand I obviously have my own plan wich for once I would like to see play out.
We will see I guess what 2013 holds. I am hoping to find some clarity soon and attack this coming year full force.
As for resolutions..... well I don't like making those..... but.....
I guess my hopes and dreams for this year are:
*To get my photography business up, running, and successful.
*To get healthy somehow...
*To decide wether or not to add another baby to the family
*To finally settle and not have half of our stuff in boxes
*To de-clutter and simplify
*To start building a food storage
*To start on genealogy
*To be closer to family
*To be a better friend
*To be a better mom and wife
We will see how bad I suck at all those at the end of the year!! LOL
Goodbye 2012!!!
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